Lucky Things Wellbeing: Why I love the seven steps in Hindu wedding vows 

Yesterday we celebrated the news of somebody’s engagement. It’s such an exciting time as you start to plan the rest of your life with someone who you really rate. Oh and you start to plan one of your best parties ever! Hearing us all share numerous wedding tips, it reminded me of our own wedding day(s). We were very lucky to have two weddings; the civil ceremony and the Hindu ceremony.

I grew up watching my cousins in Mauritius get married in their parents’ gardens. They looked like golden princesses. So that became a little dream for me and it was cool it came true. We decided to have a small Hindu ceremony in my Mum’s garden where we squeezed in a marquee (note: 60 people is really small for a Hindu wedding). Ok, it wasn’t in Mauritius but the weather North of London that day was incredible.


Yesterday I also thought about our favourite part of the Hindu wedding ceremony. It’s where the couple walks seven steps together to embed their hopes and dreams for their life as Mr and Mrs. No-one is perfect; it’s not about trying to be perfect by living all of these vows at the same time. I know some of these vows may sound ideal but along our different journeys together,  I’ve been lucky to know they can also be real.

  1. With the first step, we shall cherish each other and we will provide for our household. I always remember our Hindu priest cracking a joke as he explained to Mr.H that he would need to hand over his earnings to his Wife as she would be in charge of the household! Our priest’s sense of humour was great and yes he was right, as many women are busy running the household as well as families and their day jobs. It’s also very common for the wife and the husband to share so many responsibilities which is a huge help.
  2. With the second step, in grief we shall fill each other’s heart with strength and courage. In happiness we shall find peace. You don’t really think about having to share grief together as a couple when you get married. You don’t plan to go to funerals either. Through our IVF journey we encountered a form of grief but Mr.H also gave me courage to get through the treatment. We also share grief as we miss loved ones who aren’t there in our day-to-day lives or who are no longer with us. We always try to be grateful for those “lucky things” that bring us lots of happiness.
  3. With the third step, we celebrate our devotion to each other and we will share worldly possessions. So this one makes me smile as it’s not just about commitment to each other but “sharing is caring”. So getting married also means you now co-own that cool music collection or those handy gadgets.
  4. With the fourth step, we will acquire knowledge, happiness and harmony by mutual love and respect. I know I have learned a lot from Mr.H. He is well-known for his knowledge of, well, everything. He’s a born researcher so that’s also a great skill for being a Daddy. He also has an amazing memory so we don’t need a SatNav. Joking aside, it’s cool learning about things in life together. It’s also about working with our different perspectives. I know the tough times over the past year have taught us a lot too.
  5. With the fifth step, we will raise strong and honorable children. Well, Baby Munch is definitely a strong baby girl! I love her muscles and she is nearly in the same size clothes as her big Sis. I love Big Munch’s confidence and determination. I’d like to think she gets her resilience from her grandmothers, Aunty G, Aunty S, Aunty K and me. It’s cute how the girls are learning to look out for each other more each day.
  6. With the sixth step, we shall bring peace and harmony at all times in our life. As most of us know, life isn’t always harmonious and sometimes there needs to be “a storm before the calm”. When you’re in the thick of it, it’s hard to see how things are going to change. However, experience and my close ones have taught me that tough times can be temporary. With mutual support and understanding things do get better.
  7. With the seventh step, we will always remain true companions and we shall always love each other…I love this vow as it’s also about being best friends (forever) regardless of our imperfections.

So do any of the above seven steps remind you about your life with your girlfriend or boyfriend, husband or wife or partner-in-crime? If you’ve gone through this, what did you enjoy about being engaged or getting hitched? If you have any thoughts after reading my post, I’d love to hear what you think so leave a comment below.
Thanks for taking a look at a personal and touching post for me to write. Catch up again soon, enjoy Lucky Things.

x Sunita

 

 

 

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4 thoughts on “Lucky Things Wellbeing: Why I love the seven steps in Hindu wedding vows 

  1. Fej says:

    Thanks for this post it’s such a lovely memory and took me back (7years wow!) to our 7 steps!
    The day for me was one I remember having so many feelings and emotions all at once. Excitement about marrying my soulmate; anxiety that the day would go to plan – that whole year of planning all in one day; emotional and upset for having to ‘leave’ the home I grew up in with my family….
    I too had a civil and Hindu wedding but the Hindu wedding made it real for me…and yes, 60 really is small for an Indian wedding!

    • Sunita says:

      Ah that’s nice the post reminded you on your own wedding. You’re right you go through so many emotions on your wedding day. I’m sure you looked like a golden princess too. Thanks so much for your amazing comment, it’s lovely hearing what you think. Also congrats on 7 years of being hitched! Enjoy Lucky Things Fej X Sunita

  2. Priya says:

    Hi Sunita,
    Found your blog through another blog and very happy to connect. This post reminded me of my wedding all those years ago. You have explained the significance of those seven steps/ pheras so beautifully. 60 is indeed small number of guests for an Indian wedding. My bother married recently and we had close to 400 guests. 🙂

    • Sunita says:

      Thanks for taking a look Priya, it was nice to define the seven steps using our own experiences. Wow 400 is a lot but I know that can be normal for an Asian wedding 😉 It would be lovely to know which blog introduced you to Lucky Things. Everyone is so supportive in the blogger community.Enjoy Lucky Things blog!

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